I still cannot compel what my powers can do. For some reason I was able to see where the assassin is despite him being invisible to the eye. But for some reason, I was compelled to burn down the barn. Could this be what the consequence of using the hand will do to me? But regardless, I set it ablaze on the stairs and glanced at Timbre while doing so. it was only with Artemus hitting me was I able to regain my senses and look at the horror of what I have done. Not being able to cope with the guilt, with the team constantly reminding me of my inexcusable actions at the barn, I completely lost my composure at the House of the Stefanië and I had to excuse myself, in the poorest of manner. I had to step away from the people and understand why I had to go through this. The hand is powerful as I have noticed, but I do know that it does not come without its consequence. Perhaps if I can overcome its evil will, maybe I can use it. But I must exercise caution and perhaps only under dire situations will I use the hand for its powers.
After Timbre decided to excuse herself from the group, we decided to travel and obtain the sword that I once promised the halfling. I still feel guilty about what has happened, but I have no choice but to accept that it has happened and there is absolutely nothing I can do to change it. Though I know I can definitely trust Artemus about what has happen, but can I trust anybody else? So far, save for Timbre, most of them have seem to be reliable and trustworthy, though I cannot say if they have yet to accept me for what I have done. Especially Artemus and mother.
But at least during the evil spirit invasion, which was a very dire situation, I rolled with my chance to blast them with some sort of cold attack, which allowed me to overcome the will of the hand, but it did naught to them, but for some reason, thanks to Elyad, I was able to not damage them with the blade of Dak, but rather the blunt end of Dak, which in the end was more than enough for us to overcome that evil spirit.
We were to rest at the area during the night, but the orcs came attacking all of us by surprise. Though we were almost defeated, Elyad, Kaila, Artemus, Ha’unta, and myself were able to overcome the orcs. Though safe to say, Ha’unta shalt never be on watch again. We were able to give sword back thanks to them. I feel that I can trust them all. Maybe I should tell them what really happened. I do need the hand, but I must not forget why I am a guard captain and most importantly, why I trained my hardest. I need to avenge father, even if it comes with using the hand…..